The Frog Prince #BlogBattle #flashfiction #humour

 

The Frog Prince

 

Three frogs in fairy tale land sat on a lily pad and watched a blonde princess sob loudly, on the opposite side of the pond bank. Her long blonde locks hung over her pink tear stained face.

“What’s up with her?” croaked Ken the big frog nodding in the direction of the princess.

“She’s having no luck on the royal dating front. It’s all over Twitter” croaked Eric the spotted frog. “On her Royal Dating app she hasn’t had any princes wink  at her for days. Her Kingdom is getting impatient.”

Vince, the small frog croaked “All a fairytale Kingdom wants to see nowadays is #royalwedding” and #happilyeverafter”

“Its not looking good for her” croaked Eric.

“Tough Twitter times ahead!” croaked Vince.

Ken, shook his frog head disapprovingly before croaking “well she isn’t going to find her prince beside this pond!”

“That’s where you are wrong Ken” croaked Eric.

Ken laughed “I don’t see any princes Eric, just three frogs sat on a lily pad minding their own frog business”.

“Her last tweet was #desperatemeasures” croaked Eric. “She has been forced to turn to that old frog prince tale.”

“OMG this is scandalous news – has she really turned to that old tale?” croaked Vince looking excited.

Eric, the spotted frog nodded. “Yep, she believes that old tale is not a myth. The tale about the princess who kisses a frog and it magically turns into a handsome prince, who marries her.”

Ken snorted “Oh for goodness sake that is utter rubbish, frogs turning into princes, she has been reading too many fairy tale books!”.

They all took a moment to look at the weeping princess.

“She looks amazing” croaked Vince licking his frog mouth with his huge tongue.

“She looks like hard work!” croaked Ken watching the blonde princess start to wail.

“Think of the bigger picture Ken” croaked Eric. “You get to live in a warm castle with free WiFi and prance about on a white horse. Think of the selfie opportunities!”

“I like being a frog” croaked Ken.

“Strange” croaked Eric and Vince in unison at Ken.

The blonde princess stopped sobbing and looked out towards the lily pad. At the side of her was a golden ball which she raised into the air and threw into the pond. It gave out a large splash and caused the lily pad to dangerously rock and sway.

“What is that silly princess doing?” screamed Ken, gripping onto the lily pad.

“It’s a frog challenge. We have to retrieve her ball, take it to her and let her kiss us” croaked Eric watching the ball bob excitedly on the ripples of the pond.

Vince the small frog sprang into the air and dived into the water. He grabbed the ball and leapt onto the bank dropping it at her feet.

“Oh I can’t watch Vince make a frog fool of himself” croaked Ken turning himself around on the lily pad.

“She’s kissing him” croaked Eric staring across the pond. Silence followed and then Eric croaked “Nope Vince is not a prince”.

Loud sobbing filled the air again. The blonde princess took out her gold encrusted mobile phone and whilst struggling for breath started to tap away on it.

“What is she doing now?” croaked Ken turning back round.

“She’s tweeting her prince search live. She’s probably tweeting that her first frog didn’t turn into a prince” croaked Eric.

Vince climbed back onto the lily pad, hanging his head.

“Unlucky” croaked Eric watching his little forlorn frog friend.

“Lucky escape if you ask me” piped up Ken the big frog.

“She’s really beautiful close up” croaked Vince, looking back out across the pond at the princess.

The sobbing stopped and the frogs watched as the blonde princess chucked the ball once more into the pond.

“Wow it’s my turn!” croaked Eric the spotted frog, before diving into the pond.

“I can’t watch Eric, this is painful” croaked Ken resuming his position on the lily pad. “I wish she would leave us frogs alone”.

“Unlucky Eric” croaked Vince, watching Eric, the spotted frog, climb back onto the lily pad.

“I am gutted” croaked Eric.

“I see she is tweeting again, is that all she does?” croaked Ken.

“Doubt she will get any retweets about kissing a second frog and getting nothing. Bet she is being unfollowed by her entire Kingdom” croaked Eric.

Vince turned to grin at Ken. “Its your turn”.

“I am not doing it. I like being a frog. I am not on Twitter and I am not a prince” croaked Ken.

“Oh no she’s walking around the pond. She’s coming for you Ken. Hold still!” croaked Eric.

“This is ridiculous! Why can’t frogs be left alone to be frogs?” croaked Ken, the big frog.

The princess bent over the lily pad and grabbed Ken, who screamed loudly.

Vince and Eric chuckled as they watched the Princess raise a struggling Ken to her pouted red lips. A kissing sound filled the air. Nothing happened.

Ken croaked for joy as he leapt out of the blonde princess’s clutches and dived onto the lily pad.

Loud sobbing filled the air as the blonde princess sat down to once more weep.

“Something  tells me she won’t be tweeting about her third frog kiss failure. The Kingdom won’t be happy” croaked Eric.

“It’s all over for her” croaked Vince.

Suddenly there was a loud bang, some purple smoke and Ken the big frog turned into a handsome prince, who fell into the pond tipping up the lily pad.

The blonde princess stared in shock and grabbed her phone. Ken the now handsome prince, waded out of the pond with half a lily pad stuck to his head.

“My prince!” she exclaimed, leaping up and throwing her arms around him.

“I just want to say that I was perfectly happy with being a frog” Ken grumbled.

“Hang on my handsome Prince, let me just tweet about this magical fairy tale moment”

‘Search over – got myself #frogprince!’

photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/65882683@N03/16608443828″>Having a rest</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a&gt; <a href=”https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0/”>(license)</a&gt;

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I am a blonde writer of romantic comedy fiction.

38 thoughts on “The Frog Prince #BlogBattle #flashfiction #humour

  1. “Three frogs in fairy tale land sat on a lily pad…” I absolutely ADORE the simplicity that you use to start a story and then work that thing with magical humor and dialogue (which is something many writers struggle with) that totally keep the readers engaged and laughing. LOVE LOVE LOVE the fact Ken wanted to stay a frog!

  2. Classic yet modern fairy tale, Grimms would be proud. Hehe, poor Ken, it figures the one who didn’t want it would become the prince.
    I wondered what those frogs in the pond across from me did all day long. Now I know: they’re stalking Twitter.

      1. Maybe it’s time you changed your mind about that. Give the fair princes a chance, and I’ll take the dark princes away so they don’t distract you.

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