The Blonde Creative Agony Aunt #Writer #Amwriting

Blonde Creative Agony Aunt

 

When I am not writing my debut novel I like to transform into a ‘Creative Agony Aunt.’

I help troubled writers resolve matters of the heart using their writing skills. If you missed last week’s post please click here.

My qualifications for being a ‘Creative Agony Aunt’ are:

  • I like to talk a lot.
  • I like to give advice on things which I don’t know much about.
  • I consider myself to be a very creative person. (sigh!)
  • I care about my readers.

Here is the email from this week’s troubled Blondewritemore reader:

 

Dear Blondewritemore 

I have some strong feelings for another blogger. I have done a lot of social media research and I know they are single / searching for that special loved one. 

Every day I sit at my laptop and wait for their blog post to go live. As soon as I see their blog post flash up on my WordPress reader my heart rate quickens, I feel a burst of excitement followed by a warm glow. 

I think the blogger knows I am a big fan but I am not sure they know my true feelings. 

They are an amazing writer and their short stories always leave me wanting more. 

I was wondering whether I could use a blog post to give this blogger a subtle clue that I have the ‘hots‘ for them?

Please help as I am now desperate!

A red headed writer blogger


Hello there red headed writer blogger

My goodness you are in a creative love pickle! 

I have had a nosey at this fine specimen of a blogger you are lusting after – wow!  They certainly have a way with words and I have never seen such an exotic blog theme design before. 

After reading a couple of their short stories I had to lie down in a darkened room, with a damp flannel over my forehead, for a good half hour. You are lucky I am married or I would have given you a bit of healthy competition for this one. Sigh! 

Now, as you are a keen blogger I think using a blog post to convey your feelings to this blogger is a great idea. As soon as your post pops up in their reader they will, hopefully, get the message and your romance will start to blossom.

The 10 point blog list post’ is a format that I favour and one which I think will do the job here. It’s quick and effective.

Now as I am the Queen of Subtlety  l suggest you whip up a quick blog post titled ’10 Things I look for in a blogging love interest.’ Make sure all your points relate to your blogging love interest. They need to see themselves in your blog post. Subtle eh! 

Publish, sit back and wait for blogging love to come via a 10 point blog post list. 

I foresee three outcomes for this special post:

  1. They ‘un follow’ you seconds after your post goes live. Crushing – but at least you will know that your 10 Point List Blog post was read and fully understood. In blogging land we all aspire to creating blog posts that are read and fully understood. Don’t be sad. There are lots of other blogger fish in the sea.
  2. They understand your post’s hidden message and are delighted at the prospect of progressing to a virtual date with you. In celebration they dedicate one of their short stories to you!  Bingo! Your blogging love has begun. Let me know when the wedding is as I look amazing in a hat and will happily fly anywhere with a ‘paid for’ air ticket – sigh!  
  3. The subtle approach doesn’t work and they don’t pick up on your hidden message. This is the most likely outcome I am afraid. It will have nothing to do with your 10 point blogging list. In my experience a lot of the time love interests are too busy thinking about sport, watching TV box sets or thinking about when they can next slip down the pub for a beer. A lot of the time good things just pass them by because they have their mind on other things / not paying attention. Sometimes you just have to spell it out for them in big letters and a nice bold font. 

Good luck my red haired blogging friend! 

Now, I have left a couple of thoughtful and helpful comments on your love interest’s blog. Don’t be alarmed. I couldn’t help myself, I feel that this fine specimen of a blogger could use some of my special writing guidance. It could lead to me getting a story dedication before you but don’t worry! 

Virtual hugs!

Your Creative Agony Aunt 

Blondewritemore 

Next week this creative agony aunt gives her advice to a dark haired reader struggling to admit to close family and friends that she has a deep love for creative writing.

 

Photo: Shutterstock

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I am a blonde writer of romantic comedy fiction.

48 thoughts on “The Blonde Creative Agony Aunt #Writer #Amwriting

  1. Awww. You softie. I love your qualifications for being an agony aunt. I think you missed some of like you can listen, honesty and not being judgemental. I think it’s great what you did here.

      1. No argument there 🙂
        I’m a UK Red head lol. I was redder before I got old lol. I also had more of it hehe.
        Thanks for taking in interested in writers like you as I’m starting writing myself. Or trying to.

  2. I take great offence to point 3! Us chaps are thinking of other things apart from beer and sport. Important world changing things. If we appear not to be listen when your partner is talking about some trivial matter its because our brains are engaged on higher matters. Admittedly I can’t think of an example of what we might be thinking about so you will just have to take my word for it!

    1. Ok firstly let me apologise Eric, this insight of loved ones was based on my own experience. I did caveat this (I think) and secondly am loving your ‘trivial matter’ reference 🙂 happy Saturday my friend – are we still friends?

      1. My wife complains about my vacant looks when she is talking about her latest craft project. After 5 years of marriage you can now see through my stock pretend I’m paying attention answers.

    2. Oh Erik, if your wife can see through the stock pretend-I’m-paying-attention answers, you’re doing it all wrong. I take pride in Electra believing I’m paying attention even when my mind is miles away. The only problem is that she’s now convinced I have the memory of a goldfish, as I never seem to remember anything she says.

      She’s even written a post about it, where she outs me: http://nicholasrossis.me/2014/09/09/the-life-of-an-author-as-lived-by-his-wife-or-husband/

      1. My head is hanging below the keyboard as I write this … 😦 I know how tardy I have been 😦 …. but …. I am a bit less tardy now! 🙂

  3. This is *hilarious*!!!! I am laughing so hard right now that I’m unable to type…..”I have never seen such an exotic blog theme design before”……too funny!!! Will be back tomorrow for my daily dose of laughter therapy (to finish this post and read MORE…..(you have some special writing skills, you know….!)…..

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