Things to Avoid Saying to a Reader After The Death of a Loved Character #reader #books

Things to Avoid Saying to a Reader Grieving After The Death of a Loved Character

It is terrible when a much loved fictional character dies in the book that you are reading. The grief that you go through can be painful, emotionally draining and can last a few chapters.

If loved ones don’t tread carefully with their remarks during this challenging time they could find themselves with a cold stare, a strop or even an emotional outburst.

This blog post is a list of the things NOT to say to a reader, who is distraught over the death of their much loved fictional character.

For noting: I have also added some thoughts from the reader on hearing these inflammatory comments. I tried to put myself in the reader’s shoes and jotted down my own responses.

The more I got into this role play the more irritated I felt by the end of this list. My poor loved one could not understand why I was a little prickly with him…sigh!

So here we go, 10 things NOT to say to a reader who is struggling with death of a much loved character:

  1. “Have a cup of tea as it will make you feel better!” – I don’t want a cup of tea I want the author to rewrite the novel WITHOUT my favourite character dying!
  2. “Your character never existed!” – An infuriating comment. They did exist in my head!
  3. “It was just a story” – No that book was like a second life to me!
  4. “I never thought [enter deceased character’s name] was realistic anyway?”  – I had a huge crush on them so they must have been realistic! What are you saying about my choice in character crushes? *Followed by eye roll*
  5. “I am sure there will be other characters for you to become a fan of” – No there will NOT be another character like [enter decreased character’s name], they were one in a million. *Followed by loud wail*
  6. “Why don’t you go do something else?” – No, I want to sit and wallow in grief on the sofa whilst making my way through a box of chocolates!
  7. “You don’t see me acting like this after reading one of my spy thrillers!”  *eye roll and loud sigh*
  8. “Can you keep the noise down I am trying to watch the sport on TV”   – Infuriating! How can they sit and watch sport on TV when I am going through the five stages of grief over a fictional character?
  9. “Pull yourself together!”  – I can’t pull myself together, I am grieving!
  10. “You didn’t stop going on about that character so I am glad they met an unfortunate end!” – *gasp, followed by evil stare, followed by…give plate of loved one’s freshly cooked tea to a passing pet*

Have a great day!


photo credit: <a href=”″>Juliane</a&gt; via <a href=””>photopin</a&gt; <a href=””>(license)</a&gt;

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Lucy Mitchell lives in South Wales with her husband, her two teenage daughters, a giant labrador and a gang of unruly cats. Lucy is the author of the award winning blog, BlondeWriteMore and was a Featured Romance Author on Wattpad. When she’s not working or writing, Lucy can be found listening to audiobooks in a muddy field with her dog or sat outside her local pub in the sunshine enjoying a glass of wine. Her debut novel Instructions Falling In Love Again is OUT now and already pulling in some fabulous reviews ❤️

25 thoughts on “Things to Avoid Saying to a Reader After The Death of a Loved Character #reader #books

  1. You are not owning the cat. The cat ‘owns’ you. ‘To own’ here is a human expression. Cats don’t own in a human sense. They are far to superior to any feeble human sentiment. Cats do humans the favour of spending parts of their life with them (again a human expression, life)

  2. Oh Duke bless you! I fear my Sonu Singh is feeling the neglect too…. Here’s hoping she becomes more cuddly after 12pm…. Because we feeble nominees can do nothing after then!!!!

  3. I’ve never had a problem cuddling women in the street though apparently they have! Loss of a loved character, felt just once, I yelled ‘No’, slung the book across the room, didn’t finish it for a while, perhaps one day I’ll forgive David Nicholls, the day hell freezes over.

      1. There’s no such thing as fiction…just make believe…I felt she was real…guess that guy can write…maybe he was a cat in another life…no wonder I can’t forgive him…bet he always dumped on lawns.

  4. Enjoyed this and suddenly realized I need to follow your blog. (I know , I know why did I wait so long?) I also realized that the killing of a dog by one of my favorite authors needs to be forgiven. I’ll work on that goal.

  5. Oh dear, I see this as being a partner’s lack of understanding. However their comments are funny when seen from the point of view of how unsympathetic they are.
    Maybe you could write a story on 101 ways to kill a parter for not giving cuddles and letting you grieve. Every time this happens a new entry of three could be added? 😛
    Only a couple of days now!!!! 🙂

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