I love a Writer’s Cake Break!
The Writer’s Cake Break might go something like this:
- Literary graft. You have been at the literary coalface for sometime, hammering out paragraphs and clocking up an attractive word count. Loved ones have had some much-needed peace and quiet, whilst you have been busy writing your own version of War & Peace. Living with a writer can be sometimes chaotic and there are days when the house can feel like a hotbed of literary emotion. I think silence makes loved ones go a bit peculiar and do things they might later regret.
- Unexpected Treat. You are interrupted by your loved one and before you have time to shout at them for disturbing you they present you with a gift – a cake! They inform you that whilst in the cake shop they started thinking nice stuff about you. These thoughts led them to buying you a cake based gift. They then tell you to come and enjoy some cake with them and if you are really lucky they will make you a cup of tea.
- No Time For Cake! You roll your eyes and tell your loved one that you have no time for cake! Serious writers do not take cake breaks. The last thing you need to be doing now is stuffing your face with cake! For goodness sake this penultimate chapter is not going to write itself. The last few chapters have been a breeze and you are on a roll! Your loved one shrugs their shoulders and leaves the cake on your desk. You exhale loudly, go back to writing and think about all the sugar-coated calories contained within the cake.
- Cake Seduction. Being seduced by a naughty looking cake has to be one of life’s pleasures. The cake’s pretty icing starts to glisten in the light and you get a strong urge to touch it. Your nostrils are tickled with its wonderful cake aroma and soon you are a drooling mess. Instead of staring into space like you normally do when writing, you find yourself gazing at the cake. Taking decisive action you snap yourself out of it and tell the cake to stop flirting with you! You also inform the cake that you are a serious writer who doesn’t have time for cake breaks. Plus you know how batty you get if you have a load of sugar. If you entered crazy sugar fuelled writer mode now you can kiss goodbye to the rest of the morning. This is when the cake decides to play dirty! It makes its icing start to melt in front of your eyes. All you can see is soft gooey, mouth watering icing! Oh you naughty cake!
- Cake Break. You glance at your writing; making a note of the difficult paragraph to come, the plot hole you have just discovered and the nagging voice inside your head about that weak main character. You glance at the beautiful cake and make a quick and irrational decision – stuff the bit about being a serious writer! Sometimes a writer needs to enjoy themselves and eat cake! You grab the cake and shove it into your mouth. Oh my goodness it tastes so good! You let out a few soft moans of cake pleasure and once it’s gone you spend some quality time ‘finger mopping’ up the crumbs…all over your draft / laptop. Twenty minutes later the cake’s sugar hits your bloodstream. If only your loved one had not got carried away with the peace and quiet. Your loved one groans as you let out a squeal of excitement from writing corner. A few minutes later and you are seen cartwheeling around the garden. Your draft is amazing and a Booker Prize contender! Half an hour later and you are weeping on your loved one’s shoulder claiming that your draft is a big pile of crap.
The moral of this sugary tale is – do not disturb a writer whilst they are writing and if you going to interrupt them – for goodness sake don’t give them cake!
Have a fabulous day!