Welcome to my weekly series – Heaven Calling.
Camilla’s enjoyment of heaven life came to an abrupt end after she discovered her husband Gerry was dating again back on Earth. He’d spent two years grieving her but in Camilla’s eyes this did not feel long enough.
With her own team of angel assistants; Anna and Gabriel, some soothing harp music and God’s help, Camilla is determined to influence the outcome of Gerry’s dates and get him back to mourning her.
Camilla and handsome Pete were transformed into ghosts and sent back to Earth, so Camilla could make an unexpected appearance in Gerry’s new girlfriend’s TV show. Things didn’t go to plan for Camilla..
Here is the next part in this riveting tale:
Heaven Calling – Part 6
I am wearing headphones and slumped over a desk. Exhaustion has set in. “Please no more!” I murmur, shaking my head and putting on my best pleading face.
Anna rolls her eyes at me. “You’ve only been doing it for a few weeks. God’s prayer hotline is still jammed with prayers. You are going to have to carry on.”
I push my chair away from the desk in defiance. “Why can’t God listen to these prayers?”
Anna glares at me. “This is a fitting punishment for your ghostly shenanigans Camilla. I still can’t believe what you did!”
Using the ghost machine without God’s permission and causing him unnecessary spiritual stress got me into a spot of bother. My ghost kiss with Pete, live on national TV, sent God’s prayer hotline into meltdown. None of us, including God, expected this sort of reaction after a ghostly sighting.
I was ordered to listen to every single prayer on God’s hotline and all my privileges were removed; my weather control panel, wine, chocolate cake and my unlimited access to the angel designer dress makers.
“Camilla, Patricia’s prayer is coming through on line 2!” barks Anna, frantically pressing buttons on the prayer hotline switchboard.
I groan and sit up. Pressing the headset close to my ear I listen to Patricia’s prayer. It won’t be any different from the rest.
‘Dear God, I can’t stop thinking about that handsome ghost on the TV the other night. He was yummy! If that’s what’s on offer in the afterlife – I am in!’
I lay my head down on the desk after Patricia says amen. My eyelids are heavy, I can’t stop yawning and I would do anything for a nap.
“Camilla, Michelle’s prayer is coming through on line 4!” barks Anna, turning dials and pulling levers.
I press the headset against my ear.
‘Dear God, just a couple of things from me today!’
Gabriel, who is also listening into the prayer hotline, frowns and leans over to me. “Oh dear we have a talker, I think Michelle could go on for hours!”
I growl and he looks away, anxiously flapping his wings.
Michelle carries on.
‘I saw that ghost woman’s husband’s interview on Oprah. He looked like a broken man. Can you imagine how awful it must be to see your late wife…as a ghost… locked in a passionate embrace with a handsome male ghost? Her poor husband.’
Gerry has become an overnight TV sensation. The clip from Brooke’s show where he shouted “hang on that’s my late wife!” has been watched by millions. Since the incident, a few weeks ago, he has appeared on chat shows all over the world, talking about how painful it was to catch the ghost form of his late wife, kissing another ghost.
The living world has gone nuts over my ghost appearance and Gerry’s shocking discovery. A myriad of relationship experts have given their views on how to deal with catching your late partner being unfaithful in the afterlife. This has sparked an intense social media debate where it seems not everyone is planning to spend eternity with the love of their life on Earth.
Michelle’s prayer goes on for several hours. She explains at long length about how she’s planning to save up the air fare to the U.K. as she wants to read Gerry some soothing poetry. By the time she says amen I feel like a broken woman.
I don’t have time to moan as Anna starts waving her arms at me. “We have Margaret on line 8!”
‘Dear God, I know you are constantly reminding me about how lucky I am to have my husband Bill; he’s good at fixing cars, he has an interesting and thought-provoking stamp collection and he will give me a hug if I force him to, but I can’t help feeling envious of Camilla Jenkins. You know the ghost kissing wife! Her experience has changed my views on the afterlife. She looks like she is having a ball in the strong arms of that handsome ghost. I now can’t wait to pass over (before Bill preferably) and enjoy myself!’
I put down my headset. I can’t listen to anymore prayers.
Gabriel removes his headset. “Did I tell you that your son is feeling much better after his heartbreak?”
“Really?” As I have been on the prayer hotline for days I have not had much time to look through the cloud hole. On the night of the ghost incident Luke, my teenage son, was cruelly dumped by his latest girlfriend Estelle. He was so upset he didn’t seem to care about all the commotion going on with his father and I.
Gabriel continues. “As you know your kids have been staying with your best friend Meg, whilst Gerry is doing his Oprah thing. Both Luke and Lizzie have commented on Meg cooking amazing meals, her willingness to taxi them around and last night Luke thanked her for giving him good advice on teenage romance issues.”
Meg’s face appears in my mind and I feel a rush of affection for my old best mate. She’s been so good to Gerry and the kids since I passed over; making them hearty casseroles, ironing Gerry’s shirts and sorting out Luke’s love life.
“Why has Meg never found love?” asks Gabriel.
I shrug my shoulders. “She claimed no man ever came up to her high standards.”
Gabriel rises from his chair. “I am just going to check on life beneath the cloud hole.”
“Hello gorgeous!” says a familiar voice. We all look up to see Pete swaggering in, as Gabriel leaves God’s office.
Pete has also become famous back in the land of the living. Someone has created a Twitter and Facebook account for the ‘handsome ghost’ plus a clever woman from Texas has been selling life-sized cut outs of Pete in ghost form. The internet has been unable to cope with the demand for a cardboard version of the handsome ghost. Most purchasers apparently stand him in their toilet and pretend they are me.
Anna jumps up out of her seat. “Get out! You have caused enough trouble!”
Pete gives her a wink and comes over to me. “You look beautiful today Camilla!”
I try to smile but fail.
“What’s up?” He sits opposite me and tries on my headset.
I place my head into my hands. “Everyone is either feeling sorry for Gerry or lusting after you!”
Pete chuckles. “Hey, come on, Gerry is just enjoying a bit of fame. Is he still seeing the TV producer?”
Shaking my head I give Pete an update on Gerry’s love life. “Brooke and he split up on the night of our TV appearance. He’s now single, but his dating apps have gone mad as lots of women want to help him find love again.”
I watch Pete smile. “So why are you glum then? Do you need me to kiss you again?”
A tingling feeling envelops me. I try to shake it off. We haven’t kissed since the haunted house episode as I have been plagued with guilt. I shouldn’t have kissed Pete and especially not in front of Gerry.
“Camilla, we have Megan on line 2!” barks Anna, making me groan.
Pete waves at Anna. “It’s ok, I will take this one so Camilla can have a break.”
Whist he listens into the prayer Pete holds my gaze with his twinkling green eyes. Suddenly his expression changes.
He quickly removes the headset and hands me it. “Listen to this!”
I place the headset on and hear a familiar voice.
‘I don’t know what to do. It’s like I don’t exist. I have loved him from afar for years and now that he’s single he won’t look at me. He doesn’t realise how much I like listening to Luther Vandross, how I adore his sports car and how I love his kids. Camilla will probably strike me down with lightning bolts once she knows this.
To make matters worse Gerry’s recently become famous. I just need some sort of sign that I am doing the right thing ….loving him. If I had a sign God I would try harder to make him notice me.’
There will be more from Camilla next week.
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